The first thing I noticed about my son, other than the full head of hair that gave his mom heartburn for nine months, was how big his chest was. He is built like a prize-fighter with a thick, barrel chest tucked down into his hips like a shirt several sizes too big.
The second thing I noticed was the hospital staff wasn?t letting his mother hold him.
No warning
Parenting classes do not cover sitting, waiting, knowing something is wrong and not being able to help.
We learned a bit about Lamaze breathing techniques, all about the anatomy of childbirth and the importance of stoking breast-feeding instincts in the first hour of life outside the womb.
Then we were told our son ? yet to be named ? wasn?t turning pink like he should.
They were going to do some tests, an echocardiogram ? blood work ? surgery was mentioned.
The first thing we did was come up with a name, so we got to say a brief hello to Brendan Thomas before he was whisked away to the nursery.
“What he needs,” I remember telling Barb in frustration, “is to be with his mother and start nursing. He?ll warm up.”
She just smiled weakly and quietly urged patience.
You know something is wrong when the nurse blocks the door to the nursery with her body. Even after I promised not to freak out, they wouldn?t let me in.
More waiting.
Transposition of the great arteries
Brendan was born with the major arteries coming from his heart ? the pulmonary and the aorta ? attached to the wrong sides of his heart. Oxygen-rich blood from the lungs pumped back to the lungs while “blue” blood from the body recirculated to the body, with very little mixing in the heart itself.
He would need to go to Children?s National Medical Center on the other side of town for more conclusive testing, but if the diagnosis was correct … surgery.
The next week reels past already like some jacked-up time-lapse film. Call a priest; midnight baptism; whispered prayers; education; taking care of Mom.
I wept when the sirens left Sibley Memorial Hospital, bearing our little one across town in a Plexiglas cocoon for the most dangerous ride of his life.
At least they brought him first in so we could run a finger over his fine brown hair and kiss his forehead.
I soon learned how lucky we truly were.
Browsing “It?s My Heart,” the free parent resource book from the Children?s Heart Foundation, I learned of far more complicated conditions. I learned that 30 percent to 40 percent of children in Brendan?s situation also had a hole between their ventricles. A percentage of these had both arteries connected to the same ventricle.
“I think you were probably better off that they didn?t detect it sooner,” the world-famous Dr. Richard Jonas told us. “There?s nothing you can do about it in the womb except lose sleep and worry.”
The edge of the woods
Brendan is doing well, gaining weight, fighting thrush and an eye infection with a weakened immune system, but free from any serious complications.
Before the surgery, I told him to rest and save his strength. Afterward I tell him to fight like his life depends on it.
Now I tell him, “Hey, you were two and a half days old when they opened your chest and operated on your heart. You?ve already had the fight of a lifetime and won, so this can?t be that hard.”
I think he?s going to hear that a lot in life: learning to walk, ride a bike, bullies, math tests. He?s built like a fighter. I think he?s going to be bigger than I am some day.
