The Blind Side
A 21-year-old Tampa Bay, Fla., man is behind bars after he posed as a 14-year-old boy to play Pop Warner football.
Deputies said the 5-foot-11 and 160-pound Julious Threatts used the alias “Chad Jordan” to play one season and the beginning of another. He also tried to register at a Tampa middle school.
His ruse began to unravel after a coach thought it weird that “Chad” kept his helmet on even after the games, and began asking around. The coach found Threatts’ Facebook page. A YouTube link showed him reading a poem he wrote called “GOD… .” His most recent Twitter account, read: “just got home. Had a good practice today! Can’t wait till tomorrow.”
Authorities determined Threatts was on probation for burglary charges. He now faces charges of trespassing on school grounds, obstruction by a disguised person and violation of probation.
Jacuzzi “J’accuse!”
A Beaverton, Ore., man called 911 to tell police he needed a towel and a hug, but instead got a little bit more.
Police said Mark Eskelsen climbed a fence to get into a hot tub, then called police and told dispatchers he was the sheriff of Washington County and had been in the hot tub for at least 10 hours.
During the nine-minute call, Eskelsen later confessed that he was not the sheriff, he just needed help.
“I just need, I need a hug and, you know, a warm cup of hot chocolate with some marshmallows in it,” Eskelsen said.
Officers found marijuana and a pipe in his backpack. Eskelsen also said he had a needle and a syringe, according to police.
Eskelsen was charged with trespassing and improper use of 911.
Bonnie and Clyde they are not
A Delaware woman and her husband were both arrested on a charge of driving while intoxicated after the man slid into the driver’s seat of the car and tried to drive away while she was performing field sobriety tests.
Police said Brian Piatek started to drive the Dodge Stratus forward, before the officer ordered him to stop. Piatek allegedly put the car into the reverse, and backed into the spot it had been parked.
Piatek was charged with driving while intoxicated and with a habitual offender charge.
Nickel and dime-bagged
An Iowa man was injured after he asked for change during a drug deal.
Police said the buyer gave the alleged dealer, 19-year-old Sidney McVay Jr., too much money and he asked for his change back. The dispute escalated and McVay and his friend punched the buyer in the face. While officers were on the scene, McVay was spotted by a witness and arrested.
Nice going, Slick
A would-be burglar who tried to break into a South Carolina restaurant found himself in a tight and a greasy situation.
The Post and Courier of Charleston reported a man was stuck for almost seven hours after he climbed into a grease vent overnight. The man was discovered when an employee heard someone calling for help. Police found Kevin Michael Harley foot’s dangling in a vent above a stove.
He was charged with second-degree burglary.
— Scott McCabe
