Does Gilbert Arenas have a future in politics after his NBA career is over? This week brought us to the realization that Agent Zero is the Wizards’ alternate player rep behind Kirk Hinrich. How did he get enough votes for this job?
10. Promised to fight for the “inalienable right” of players to fake injuries.
9. Gained insight on the political process by watching C-Span at the halfway house.
8. Will work with D.C. officials to establish Verizon Center as a “safe haven” for unregistered handguns.
7. Wants all NBA arenas to go hypobaric by 2012.
6. Players impressed that Arenas could see Russia from his home in Great Falls.
5. Will work with league to install online poker stations for players on the bench.
4. Appealed to voters with a middle name change to Hussein.
3. Wizards blown away by his campaign speech: “Ask not what your league can do for you. Ask what you can do for your league.”
2. Will lobby David Stern to abolish overtime. Tie games to be decided by coin flip.
1. Players intrigued by his campaign slogan — A Poop in Every Shoe.
